Her Secret Corner… Spanking Erotica

I’ve had some wicked insomnia the last few nights, which sucks, but does lead to some creative musings.

It’s amazing what I’ll ponder during a long, sleepless night.  My mind is on spanking at the moment, so that is what has filled my thoughts. 

I am actively looking for a partner, which is hard, because I’m shy.  I also have some health issues that not every man is going to want to deal with.  But I really, really want spanking.  And I really want a connection with someone.  I’d like to find someone I can laugh with, hang out with, and trust.

Trust is a big component when it comes to the whole spanking “thing.”

Obviously, I want to give up some control; but, exactly how much?

It is said that a couple should never play without benefit of a safe-word.  I tend to agree, but I’ve thought about the concept of a safe-word a lot.  Couples who employ real domestic discipline usually don’t have safe-words; the whole point is punishment, and if you’re being punished, you don’t have a say in when it ends or how much it hurts.  After all, it is supposed to hurt.

But I know for myself, real dd is not what I’m after.  But I do want my limits pushed.  And I do want to give up some control.  Giving over that control is where the stress release comes in for me. 

Having said that, it would go against my grain to give up control entirely. 

So where is the balance?

For a long time I thought maybe two safe-words might be a good idea.  One that means ease up, I need a break and another that means I’m done.  But lately I find the idea of only one safe-word, designed to pause the action briefly, much more titillating.

If I were to find someone I trusted, wouldn’t it be much hotter to let him decide when enough is enough?  Isn’t that part of the whole “alpha” male equation?

As if I didn’t have enough to think about already, I read a post today that really caught my attention.  It was on a forum where wives were talking about being spanked by their husbands.  One woman said that a previous boyfriend had insisted on a safe-word, and she had used it regularly.  Her husband, however, did not allow one.  His whole point was to spank her past the point of tears.  They incorporate real punishment in their relationship, which she submits to willingly. 

What she had to say was interesting to me.  She said that although she didn’t enjoy being brought to tears and beyond, the release that she felt after these sessions with her husband was incredible.  As was the sex that followed.  And she had never reached that point with the previous guy.

There is a part of me that fantasizes about being pushed this far past my comfort zone.  But fantasy and reality are very different realms.

I can’t help but remember that old saying: “Be careful what you wish for…”